Time Travel

I watched a movie about a guy who gets back to be seventeen years old again so he could make things right. Can you even imagine that? I know I can’t!

Well… maybe I can…

“So…”

Ok fine. Let’s just think about this for a tiny little bit.

If you could go back in time, to which point of your life would you go?

Would you go back to when you were seventeen as well? I think I wouldn’t. That season wasn’t that good for me and I do believe that I wouldn’t like, neither have I ever wanted, to go back and go through that tough time all over again.

“Then to which point would you go to?”

I think that I’d choose my first years, when I was a baby and had no conscious about what time or disappointments or job haunting were (happy times, right everyone?)

I’d go back to those times when I didn’t even knew how to write or read, back to a time in life where we don’t hold a single worry, and I’d get a chance to grow up all over again.

It is what it is. When we grow up, we become adults before we know it, and the time of fairytales is over – the responsibility of doing what you must in order to pursue a life for yourself makes you leave your favorite toys aside and you no longer remember how joy would bring a smile to your face whenever you’d see someone you liked or whenever someone would give you a gift.

We grow up and most of our most innocent joys are replaced by the list of things we have to do, and happiness becomes, somehow so hard to find.

Some of you may say that it’s not only the happiness that is hard to find, and I have to agree. It’s hard to find ourselves as well. It is hard to find our path. Well, if you’re looking for it, as I am.

Unfortunately (or maybe fortunately, I’m still not sure) there isn’t a yellow brick road to follow, neither someone offered us a pair of red shoes, but the thing is that we’re the ones who are meant to choose where we want to go.

We don’t have to follow the most common path just because that’s the one everyone else is following. We don’t have to follow the main trail neither we should make our choices based in what everyone else is doing – we can explore a path that no one ever walked through. We must do what suits us, and if exploring is what you want, then do it.

If it turns out not being the right way to go, don’t worry. You have time to start over and simply choose another way to go.
And if you’re stuck like me, unsure of where you want to go, just keep going. Keep walking, keep discovering, and maybe something good will cross your path.

The truth is that, even if it was possible, I wouldn’t go back in time. I think it’s more important to live in the present doing my very best to keep going day after day, hoping for better things in the future ahead.

The past wasn’t bright. That’s a fact. And I don’t want to return to feel that pain ever again.

There was a time where I had to go through a storm and it wasn’t pleasant, neither was it supposed to be so. It shook the floor beneath my feet and it left me in between the fear of losing someone and the reality of the painful loss, both of them shattering my heart.

There were good moments too. But in order to remember those, I rely on my memory, even if it’s a bad one, and in the amount of photographs that aren’t as many as I’d like them to be, but are still enough to not forget there were smiles somewhere back then.

Tough times create tough people.

I don’t consider myself as a tough person. I just want to keep my balance and remember what matters in order to do so.

But maybe that’s the tricky thing. Maybe I shouldn’t be looking for balance since I know I’ll lose it whenever my ground shakes again, because I know that, in the future, there will be times when I won’t feel balanced enough to keep walking on my tightrope, because that’s how life goes: unexpectedly, it makes you consider everything you’ve known so far and it tests your ability and your strength to keep fighting.

Maybe what matters isn’t just balance since we never know how long is going to take to lose it again, but the strong belief that no matter how many times we fall, we still can go back to that tightrope and try again. That no matter how many times we lose our balance, we are able to know that it’s ok, that we are ok, and that we can go back and try once again.

Sometimes, when things don’t work out the way we want them too, we tend to think that it’s over and that there isn’t any other way. But there is, folks. There will always be a way to go.

Remember that new beginnings only come after endings.

And now, tell me the name of your favorite actors, I’d love to know!

In 3…2…1! Go!

With Love,
Ana.

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